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Does it feel like this?

It feels like a constant heaviness in your mind; like something isn’t quite right, although oftentimes you don’t know exactly what that something is.
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If someone raises their voice around me, or I see violence on the television, I have to remove myself from the situation as I find it too overwhelming. My ex partner still haunts my days in flashbacks and my nights in nightmares.

Although the abuse itself happened more than a decade ago, I still experience trauma when triggered. I am absolutely terrified of loud or sudden noises which make me palpitate (best case) or give me panic attacks (worst case).

It's like someone or just me myself, that I am suffocating my self.

I feel like no one understands me.

When I cut myself, it felt like I was doing something for myself on my own body. As soon as the cut would bleed, I would panic and break down because I didn’t want to scar myself but now it was done and I felt even more helpless.

Disclaimer: This guide has not been put together by mental health professionals. It is not intended to be medical advice. It has been crowdsourced by survivors and volunteers of Chayn. Care has been taken in reflecting the experiences and knowledge of people around the world, including therapists but information in this guide should be taken instead of certified medical advice. Please seek professional support.

Getting better & moving on: A guide for mental healing after abuse and trauma by CHAYN is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.